Let Us Leave

Let us carve our felonies deep
Etched into the searing skin
Stare at them in pained nostalgia
Let us drink our pockets full of sin
Celebrate our depraved imagination
Destroy the mandate of rules within.

Let us take hold of our slumbering wants
Discover the man behind the fogged glass
Let us be bare and unguarded
Showcase our corroded yet young heart
Let us be proud of our longing
Elevated beyond comprehension of freedom.

Let us be not aware of the purpose
Wild frenzy to feed our corpus
Golden age was never to be claimed
Let us flesh out our innate love
Spread it around and save a little
For only it matters in the end so brittle.

Sleep to die

Welcome to the forgotten kingdom
here the keys do not exist
guarding the periphery, misunderstood
stands a lonely soldier
obsession is his poison
consumed by loss, he searches in vain
for the invisible bond, the cure
he was made to believe in
time a sadist healer,the poor man aged,
Lost his silk and the bite
so alone in his pursuit,
nothingness greets him at every corner
nature failed him so did the humans
guilt free, he bled silver
purpose? love? awareness? lies? truth?
in the jumbled up world of madness
he forced his eyes to black every night
giving up and hoping in the same flight
done are his days to dwell
the dark woods provide him a safe shell
he goes to sleep only to die within
no keys, no locks, no gates
he rests with his unknown sins.

Dissolution

Clouds spilled their melancholy to feed
a gradual dissonance of the fading blue
poured love washed away from
the crumpled paper lying deep
within the private quarters,
It bore inside the inexplicable words
practiced innumerably in front
of a mirror perpetually blurred
Never were they put forth to the recipient
fatal it would prove if ever revealed
instead they were swallowed in
a daze of momentary panic, gulped
drowned with whiskey, indulged
One night the mirror gave up the charm
bottle was neglected, another letter
devoured by fire, want dissipated and sky cleared.

Vain

Once the trees stopped swaying,
the leaves held their breath.
They were his suffering friends
plagued with barren love, he sailed.
Fragrance in air, he knew so well
to let it fill up his pores.
The last touch, how to breach
So valuable and close , so out of reach
All the toys were destroyed
He sprang out of the mirage soiled.

The failure of the stars to shine
waiting fields turn to moor
all those chemicals in the eye
trickling down the flowers, are dry.
Now the place reeks of despair
yet the wind is so familiar
murky are the ambivalent paths
dearth of thoughts, the only pass.
Running to the hills,
a search for the origins
buried inside his own mind
flooded with love so blind.

Schism

My precious thoughts, they leak
Onto the sedimented rocks, they sleep.
Tread cautiously you comely woman,
As you callously walk around
You touch them and provide false hope.

The schism is tangible and inflated

Relapse and recovery a cliched cycle
Perennially disturbed, a biased trial
Exhumed feelings and morbid flesh lust
So good together, remnants of feigned crust.

Epilogue

Welcome aboard the house of cards
humble abode, no holds barred
Our hearts laid the foundation
part misery part joy,
life and death in its creation.

Careworn door creaks out sonnets
masking the muffled screams
It once held love in every corner
now it is a trapping circle.

Sit by the library's fire, rest your head
enough time to wallow in burning nest
Read the chapters which once touched;
entwined our souls, made you smile
another lifetime it was, a work of fiction

Long night holds on, she is a friend
fogged windows demand an end
to the story, waiting for the sun
afraid of the light, we run
and hide within ourselves.

We try to talk, we don't understand
empty hope fills up the land
We again try to swim past the 'past'
"Are we strangers again?" She asked
Fragile dreams my love, they don't last.

Stairs are self imploding, dance and swing
Hand in hand, we walk towards it and sing
House of cards is going down, so are we
These were good times, she said
Kiss and bid me farewell,
Without you, it would have been a waste of time.

Brain Ooze Pt.4

Desire or want, the most primal and unbridled yet neurologically built feeling. I'm not lucid very often, there is always ambiguity and complications involved in my thought process. I always look out for the voice of clarity that wheedles me out of the spiralling puzzle but for once let me go out on a single foot and define desire and want as seperate units. Although as I write this, I lie in a sea of contradictions but for this one time I'm going to write what feels right.

Want is free from any influence in it's core, it is something that is unique and rare singularly at once. It is an unknown bit which gradually offshoots its colours, it can leave us puzzled, shocked, sometimes ecstatic but never sure and that makes us all fickle beings. It can be spiritual in the broader sense of term, more psychomatic, something for which the minute tissues in your organs are striving for, an unknown carrot dangling in front of our mule's body to keep it going. Want is as real and closer to truth as the bodily fluids, it makes us realize who we are. It is our becoming. Once we let ourselves completely immerse in it, there is no stopping the bird in us. I guess birds were created so we can stay inspired.

Desire's corners lie on the extreme ends of all the spectrums. In my honest opinion I find desires to be manipulated, influenced by external sources. They are almost materialistic needs we crave to make us feel no less than the others. Desire may mould us but that form is deformed, that is not who we are but who we perceive us to be according to the world. The inception of desire is not as pure as our wants because it can be inseminated in us, it is not visceral, not present inside our souls.

A sports car , a musician's dream, to hold hands, to write a story, to have an ear to speak to, to listen, rape, lust, love, a doors poster signed by Morrison, search for the invisible truth, innards of her heart and brain, all of these are cardinal elements. I want someone to distinguish the wants and desire. Clarity hold me in your arms and break my neck.

Mired

I'm a catalyst slipping through
The permeable skin of your thoughts
Novice increment of the new one's
They wash away my existence
Waves constantly disintegrating the stone
Now I'm sand, I look pale but look
Closely, I'm interesting and colorful.

A kite that flies miserly and shy
Yet it takes a flight to make you try
Now I morph, where are the strings
Make me, Use me, mold me, love me
Don't feel guilty, I've lost enough, kill me
The change is mine to make or take
Keep my heart beating for your's sake.

Pumping through the veins I spike
I'm a part of your organic matter
Think of me, feel my disposition, no blunder
Buzzing through your ears, I'm euphony
Remember me, once you bared the soul
I did the same, maybe a divergent goal
As you set the fire and lose the footing
In the boggy quagmire, I sing
Buried. Buried forever.

Bore Spirit & Stoic Den

My heart reeks of selective compassion
A grey charcoal laden heftiness
paves the path, singular choice in selection
Scentless thoughts, monochrome voice
Reckoning occluded, I hear no noise.

Petrified of these new beings, they entice,
Read my limpid soul, the period is a bliss
Sudden realization of a veil crossed
Oh now they are an apparition,
hands disappear, they overcome me
And move on.

I stay, I hope, I return, I bore
Cardinal sin of disinterest I tore
A moment of benign feelings expressed
They don't prefer pervasive honesty
This inexplicable need for love
It is a weakness I'm told, hold it
inside, anomalous those who show it.

Now the sand glass is drained and split
Time is thrown out of the stained window
We are abstained, gagged and frozen
Living a sadist fantasy, sad and sullen
I tell them to not stop feeling and show
A dour place where pent up rivers flow.

Afraid of their naked self in the open
Self preservation only in this stoic den
It all combines, is it a crime to be doting
Convoking the kindred spirits, few flying
into the wild, only they will not ignore
As I perceive sometimes, I'm a door or a bore.

The Boy Who Stopped.

Once upon a time, a boy lived
Beseiged by concrete walls
Putrid smell of wasteful thoughts
Fouled the air he breathed

He was alone with metal boxes
No pets, no people, only longing
To feign importance to his prime
He concocted tales of unabashed rhyme

His malaise was deemed uncurable
An illness of magnanimous scale
Medicines were futile against heart
A heart brimming up with loneliness

How to get close to a distance
Which no love could cross
Naked he felt, a virgin in feeling again
Crevices in skin oozing the sickness

It's all in the head and yes it's real
Bottle with no inhibition mapped
Quick succession, a foregone trap
He saw someone, always out of reach
A hand to touch only in dreams

Mother, he missed in his routine tales
Father, he ashamed all his life
A sense of closeness, a silk veil
Now he is fond of the black drop
It melts the baggage and hides him

A mask of tranquility, a featureless face
Now he walks freely, with a smile
Rancid thoughts his heart ogles, still
Trust no one but long for their words

Never tell them, destroy yourself
Told you! Hah! No one gives a fuck
He still gave himself, played all in
His cards though never made the play

Never in history could he be remembered
Not significant, so loved by the others
But one love he could never find
Was the one for himself

No one told him otherwise to assume
Now he sleeps and dreams
Of vacant spaces and empty chairs
Now he wants loneliness

His only loyal friend, a dive, a shot
Now no laughter, no tears, no surprises
It's dark. Born and Raised.
Finally he stopped talking.